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Masinile le-am folosit doar ca sa duc si sa aduc copiii de la scoala, sa merg la cumparaturi sau cel mult sa mergem in concediu. Si acum cand stau intins si astept la moarte stiti ce e cel mai rau din toate ? After the surgery, the man tells his doctor it's amazing - he's never felt better. On his way home, he feels that he's in such a good mood he's going to buy a new suit to celebrate his new start on life. As he walks in, the tailor looks over and says "48 broad jacket, 17" collar, 34" sleeve, 34" waist and 32" inseam."The man stops, shocked. Avocatul: Inteleg, dar nu ar fi putut totusi ca pacientul sa fie viu, in ciuda acestui lucru? Paddy was planning to marry and asked his doctor how he could determine if his new bride is still a virgin. The doctor responded, "Some red paint, some blue paint, and a shovel.” “Aye. ” The doctor replied, “Before ye climb into bed on your wedding night, you paint one of your balls red and the other one blue.

"Oh yes, please."The tailor then said "if you'd like, I can also custom order you some size 34 silk boxers."The man grinned. I wear size 32 briefs."The tailor looked at him accusingly. Avocatul: Doctore, inainte sa faci autopsia, ai cautat sa vezi daca mai avea puls? The doctor said, ' Well, you need three things. A doua zi, in ora respectiva, Cristian a dat urmatorul exemplu:- Tatal meu este fermier si crestem gaini. Aveam de toate: masini bune cu care cutreieram lumea, femei frumoase cu care ma simteam bine, foarte multi prieteni si un cont mare in banca. - Spuneti-mi, va rog, ce statiuni balneare sunt acolo? He's miserable because they cloud his thinking, he's lost several jobs, he's divorced - he's on the verge of suicide. Toti asteptau in liniste si deodata batranul se trezeste si spune:-Trebuie sa va spun un secret mare! "Don't be silly," he replied, "if you wore size 32 briefs they'd crush your testicles into the base of your spine and you'd have massive migraines."A man goes to the doctor with chronic migraines. Biologul se uită un pic la ele, le ia nişte probe de ţesuturi, dar nu reuşeşte să rezolve problema. Avocatul: Doctore, e adevarat ca daca o persoana moare in somn, el nu-si va da seama de treaba asta pana a doua zi dimineata? Avocatul: Deci data conceperii (bebelusului) a fost 8 August. she measures 36-24-36, and the other arm is just as big.84. she’s half Italian, half Irish, and half American.87. "A cowboy, riding across the prairie, came upon a Indian lying buck-naked on his back with a huge erection. It's 1 PM." The cowboy rode on, but soon came upon another naked Indian lying on his back with another huge erection. The only unoccupied seat was directly adjacent to a well dressed middle aged lady and was being used by her little dog. Not surprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.17. După ce a încercat metodele convenţionale, a chemat un biolog, un chimist şi un inginer ca să afle ce au. Ne puteti da un exemplu de ceva pe care l-ati uitat? she was floating in the ocean, and Spain claimed her for the New World.9. the sign inside one restaurant says, “Maximum occupancy, 512, or Yo momma.”13. the back of her neck looks like a pack of hot dogs.15. when she ran away, they had to use all four sides of the milk carton.19. when she gets in an elevator, it has to go down.47. she’s been declared a natural habitat for condors.75. when she goes to the zoo the elephants throw her peanuts.77. she doesn’t have a tailor, she has a contractor.83. "I won a hundred bucks; here's your fifty, now get out! The Indian looked at the shadow of his d¡ck and said, "Checking the time. The train was very crowded, so the soldier walked the length of the train, looking for an empty seat. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft.

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